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The Sex Code --- Version 1.3


The Sex Code is yet another signature code, modeled after the Geek Code, and using elements from that, the Whore Code, and the Other Sex Code, which is much smaller than this but was there first.

The Sex Code isn't so much about your identifying features (you can use the Geek Code, Whore Code or Pearce Code for that type of information, although I'll add it if people bug me enough). Its main purpose is to encode the type of sex you like, how much you like it, and how often. It's very much a Your Kink Is OK code, so I've tried to include as many different things as reasonable, although I've stayed shy of illegal/non-consensual stuff. Feel free to send me new ideas.

Instructions For Use

The Sex Code is broken down into a large number of categories of two basic types: miscellaneous categories and preference categories. In both cases, your code for that category will consist of a letter, possibly with modifiers before or after it, and a number of plus and/or minus signs (this number could be zero). The letters are case sensitive, that is, lower case and upper case are not the same thing. The miscellaneous categories occasionally have special rules, and they each tell you how to use the plus and minus signs for that category (if applicable); the preference categories all work the same way, described below.

When you have gone through the code and selected your choices for each category (feel free to ignore some that don't interest you or you have no opinion on or whatever), string all these codes together with spaces between them. This is your Sex Code. You may want to put it in your signature and/or on your web page.

Note: You put your codes together in the order the categories appear, even if you skip some: it makes it much easier for someone else to decode.

Example Sex Code

SPoSlSi/Bi/MaEr A22 W--:++ !H w+ h+ D++ P43 E+++ a++ Ag++ ?Ar+ ?b+ cg+++ C++++ ?Co+ d+ ?Di e fr+++ ?fg+++ ?Fg-r ?Fi- ?g++ i ?I- k+++ m+++ ?n+ p+ P(+) ?r++ ?s++ S+++ ?Sc--- ?Sw++ ?t+ wa++ ?Wa--

The meaning of the above code gives you an idea of the type of information that can be encoded in a very short space with this code. This is my code, by the way.

Global Modifiers


These modifiers are placed before the letter for the category.

This indicates that your place in this category varies all over the place depending on when you're asked or who asks you or whatever. If you put + or - signs, the number only indicates the answer you are usually closest to, your 'home base' so to speak.
This indicates you get paid for your participation in this category. If you ever use this on the Sex Code, you may find yourself getting a lot of envy!
This indicates you refuse to participate in this category. No + or - signs should be used in this case.
This indicates you haven't done whatever the category refers to. The number of + or - signs used indicates where you think you'd be if you tried it.
This indicates the value given is approximately correct and you can't or won't clarify further.

Other Modifiers

This modifier is placed between two sets of + or - signs, indicating that the one on the left is current but you'd like to be the one on the right.
This modifier is placed between two sets of + or - signs, indicating that the one on the right is current and you used to be the one on the left.
This modifier is placed between two sets of + or - signs, indicating that your responses in this category range from the value on the left to the value on the right.
Parentheses are put around a set of + or - signs indicating that this is an alternate value, i.e. you are sometimes the value outside the parentheses, and sometimes the one inside the parentheses, but you never move through the values in the middle.

Extended Modifiers

Extended modifiers are used to specify that a range applies only under a particular circumstance. Extended modifiers go with the rest of the + or - signs, and are of the form #[letters]{[signs]}, where [signs] is a number of plus or minus signs, as usual, and [letters] is an extended modifier code from the list below. Extended modifiers indicate that that pariticular group of signs applies only with the specified type of person or in the specified situation. Example: W#F{-}#M{++} means I like my women a bit skinny and my men kinda chubby. Extended modifiers may hold other +/- string modifiers inside the curly brackets.

When drunk
When stoned

There needs to be more modifiers here, but I'm stuck for right now.

Example Modifier Usage

These examples use the A (age) code and the W (partner's weight) codes.

I can enjoy partners of all different weights, but prefer them slightly on the plump side as often as not.
Severe anorexics pay me to have sex with them.
I refuse to judge people on the basis of weight.
I've never judged anyone based on their weight, but if I did I'd probably like them a little plump.
I'm approximately 20 years old, and you're not getting any more out of me than that!
I'm 20, and hope to make it to 21.
I'm 21, but, like, I used to be 20 (giggle)!!
I generally like my partners a little on the skinny side, but occasionally (or in some particular circumstance) I like clinically obese people.

Miscellaneous Categories

General Information

Start with a capital S, then place all the two letter codes that apply after it from the lists below. Each seperate list should be seperated by a /.

Relationship Style and Status

I am monogamous, as in I will not have sex outside of a committed relationship with exaclty one other partner.
I am polygamous/polyamorous, meaning I prefer to have relationships with more than one person at a time, or at least to have this option open. Meaning of 'relationship' left intentionally vague.
I prefer neither of the above, whatever happens, happens.
I'm a slut, that is I prefer to have relationships where there is friendship and sexual involvement just that way, without the foolishness of romantic love. My life is my own, and I like that.
I am currently single.
I am currently married to one or more people. Note that whatever you think of as married counts.
I have been divorced one or more times in the past.
I have had one or more people die on me while we were married (i.e. I am or have been a widow).

Sexual Preference

I'm straight, I prefer to have sex with members of the opposite sex.
I'm bisexual, I have sex with members of either sex.
I'm gay, I prefer to have sex with members of the same sex.

Ethnicity and Gender

I'm male (i.e. I currently have male genitalia).
I'm female (i.e. I currently have female genitalia).
I'm a pre-op transgendered. This should be given with another gender code which indicates the gender your operation will move you towards should you go through with it.
I'm a post-op transgendered. This should be given with another gender code with indicated the current state of your genitalia.
I'm transgendered, but non-operative and planning on staying that way. This should be given with another gender code for the gender you act as, and assumes that that gender does not reflect the state of your genitalia.
I'm European.
I'm African.
I'm Native American.
I'm Oriental.

Example General Information Code

My code here is SPoSlSi/Bi/MaEr. The meaning is I'm a single polyslut who is bisexual, male and european.


Start with a capital A, then place your age (or one of the modifiers if you don't want to tell).

Body Partner Types Preffered


How heavy do you like 'em? Note that this specifically refers to body fat, although really skinny values imply lack of musculature as well. The letter used here is W.

I like pretty average people.
I like my partners a little on the chubby side.
I like my partners rather fat.
I like my partners really huge.
If you can't get out of bed, don't worry, I'll come to you!
I like my partners somewhat skinny.
I like to be able to see ribs.
I like to be able to count all the bones in my partners body --- with their clothes on.
I also dabble in necrophilia, because my partners keep starving to death on me.


How tall do you like 'em? Note that this value should take male/female differences into account. The letter used here is H.

I like people of average height.
I like people who are somewhat tall.
I like rather tall people.
I like 'em huge.
Non basketball players need not apply.
I like people who are a bit on the short side.
I like people who are rather short.
I like people who are vertically challenged.
I like dwarfs.

Own Body Type

This is done just like the two above, but with the letters w and h respectively. Remember the code is case sensitive!

Sex Drive

This measures how often you like sex. Use a D for this category. This value should represent the least often you could have sex over a long period of time and not get disgruntled, assuming it was available, in other words the smallest amount of sex you'd be happy with. A good way to measure this is, if I was in a relationship with someone for a long time, and for the last sixth months we've been having X amount of sex, would I complain?, and use the smallest answer for which the answer to that question is no.

I like it once a week.
I like it twice a week.
I like it once every two days.
I like it once a day.
I'm always ready!
I like it twice a month.
I like it once a month.
I like it once every few months.
I'm just not interested much at all in sex. Why I'm writing a sex code for myself I have no idea.


This measure how likely you are to try new things when the opportunity comes up. The letter used here is E.

I do try new things. Sometimes. Really!
I'm rather open.
I try to try something new ofen. Not much squicks me.
I like to try something new whenever I can. I'll try anything once (or twice).
I actively seek out new experiences constantly, to the frequent annoyance of my partners as I get bored quickly.
I've tried new things, but that's in the past.
New things are what being a teenager is for.
New things are what being a child is for.
People tell me I must have tried something new or I would never have learned to walk, but I don't believe them.


For this, use a P and put your Purity Test Score after it. That would be your purity percentage, i.e. the total number of questions divided by your number of No answers, times 100. I recommend you use the 500 Point Omnisexual Purity Test for consitency with other Sex Code users. If using the 500 point version, your P number is your number of No answers divided by 5. If you don't know what I'm talking about, go to The Armory List of Purity Tests.

Complete General Information Example

Again, this is from my own code: SPoSlSi/Bi/MaEr A22 W--:++ !H w+ h+ D++ P43 E+++. The meaning of the first part was already given, the rest is that my age is 22, I like people in the healthy range of weights (from rather skinny to rather fat), I don't much care about people's height, and I myself and a bit chubby and tall. My minimum comfort level for sexual activity is once every two days (assuming I can get some!), I'm only 43% pure, and I'll try anything a few times.

Preference Categories

Preference Scores

The following is the meanings of + or - groupings when used in the Preferences section.

I have no real opinion on this activity. I can take it or leave it, and whether I participate in it or not depends on how much my partner(s) like(s) it.
I enjoy this activity, and will participate in it if the opportunity comes up.
I really love this activity, and will get annoyed if I can't participate in it for a long period of time.
This activity is sufficiently important to me as to end relationships with partners who don't like it. Almost every sexual encounter I have includes this activity.
I have a clinical dependence on this activity: I cannot become aroused unless it (or possible some other activity I'm dependent on) is involved in the sexual session at hand.
Why yes, I am in therapy. Why do you ask?
I don't much like this activity, but I don't mind participating in it if I'm with someone who likes it.
I hate this activity, and would only participate in it if someone I cared (or lusted after) a lot begged me at length to do it.
I really hate this activity, and will not participate in it, ever.
I have a clinical phobia of this activity. Don't even discuss it around me, please.
I turn into a raging axe murder when this activity is mentioned, and I'm also in therapy, why do you ask?

Also, you can specify different things for the giving and recieving end of the category in question, assuming your opinions on the two are different. To do this, put 'g' or 'r' after the letter and before the + or - signs. To specify both, but the letter, then g, some - or + signs, r, then some more - or + signs. Modifiers that go after the letter can be used seperately in the g and r sections. Let's say the code is X. If you really like having someone do X to you, but hate doing it to others, you would put Xg--r+++. On the other hand, if you're rather indifferent to going X to someone else but dislike having it done to you, you would use Xgr-.

The Actual Categories

This is the good stuff. The moment you've all been waiting for. Each category is described briefly, use the Preference Scores section to construct the actual codes. Ordering is alphabetical, lower case first. Some of the codes are two letters, due to conflicts with other codes. Note to self: g and r are never used as second letters due to possible confusion.

For those codes where giving and receiving don't have the usual meaning (Co and Cd come to mind immediately, and r seems to count as well), giving means you like (or dislike) performing the activity, receiving means you like (or dislike) dealing with/having sexual interactions with people who perform the activity (i.e. Cdg++ means crossdressers turn you on).

Just as a note, I use rather more polite language here than I'm normally accustomed to. The reason is I don't want this page blocked by porn blockers if I can possibly help it.

Anilingus, or rimming: licking someone's anus.
Anal Sex, dildoes can count.
Bondage: being tied up.
Bestiality: look it up.
Branding & Scarring: +/- can reflect how many you have as well as enjoyment of getting them.
Cunnilingus: licking vaginas.
Cuddling: hugging, spooning, being sweet.
Cross-dressing: Dressing up as a member of the opposite gender to whatever you normally act as. This provides for interesting interactions with Tg...
Costumes: I like dressing up.
Dildoes: artificial penises.
Discipline: spanking and like that.
Eating: using edible things (chocolate sauce, edible undies, etc.) in a sexual context.
Fellatio: sucking on penises.
Foot Fetish: likes little toesy woseys.
Fisting: like m, but bigger...
Group Sex: more than two.
Intercourse: penis-in-vagina type stuff.
Infantilism: Mmmm... Diapers...
Kissing: nothing special here, move along.
Mutual masturbation: manual stimulation of a partner's genitals.
Massage, as an erotic experience.
Meta: place a word after the Me to indicate things not included on this list (i.e. MePteraphilia++ to indicate your interest in Pteraphilia (don't ask)).
Net Sex: typing to turn someone on.
Phone Sex: talking to someone erotically on the phone.
Pain Play: make it hurt so good...
Piercings: weird attachments... Number of ++++s if you have piercings should indicate how many/weird they are.
Role Playing: doctor, nurse, mommy, daddy, maid,...
Submission: giving someone your all. Note that Domination is just sr.
Safe Sex: uses condoms and like that.
Scatology: look it up, I ain't telling you.
Swinging: switch your partner round and round...
Toys, other than dildoes.
Tantra: sacred sexuality of whatever kind (Tantra, Taoist, Western Sex Magick, Pagan Ritual Sex, etc.).
Watching: covers both exhibitionism and voyeurism.
Watersports: likes urine.


I hope you've had fun filling out your Sex Code. You can put it in your signature or on your web page, and I recommend (stole this from the Geek Code author) that you put it in a Sex Code Block, like below:

Version: 1.2
SPoSlSi/Bi/MaEr A22 W--:++ !H w+ h+ D++ P43 E+++
a++ Ag++ ?Ar+ ?b+ cg+++ C++++ ?Cd++ ?Co+ d+ ?Di e fr+++ ?fg+++ ?Fg-r ?Fi- ?g++
i ?I- k+++ m+++ ?n+ p+ P(+) ?r++ ?s++ S+++ ?Sc--- ?Sw++ ?t+ ?T++ wa++ ?Wa--
------END SEX CODE BLOCK------

Above all, play safe and have fun!

What's New

In 1.3

Thanks to (Leigh Ann) for the idea that led to Extended Modifiers.

In 1.2

Thanks to (Drew Hamilton) for the idea of a meta tag (Me).

Thanks to Shannon Mann for the mention of massage (Ma). Doh!

In 1.1

Thanks to for pointing out lacks of crossdressing codes and making suggestions on that and sacred sex. As a result, added Tg gender code, Cd and T preference codes, and the paragraph on giving and receiving in codes where that doesn't really apply. She also mentioned piercings, which make for a nice exception (I don't like exceptions!), and I added Branding and Scarring.